When you’re in a long-term relationship, it’s easy to let dating go by the wayside.
“If you do what you did in the beginning of the relationship there won’t be an end.”
Do any of these sound familiar?
“I believe in the value of time together as a couple, but life goes by so fast…”
Schedules reflect priorities. Carefully consider how the ways that you’re investing time today might impact your relationship in the future.
“We have date night every other week, but it’s always dinner and a movie…”
It sounds like you might be stuck in a dating rut. You may have wanted to try new things, but either failed to plan ahead, or just lack alternative ideas.
Dating Isn’t Just for Newbies!
“Sure, we have romantic nights out… on Valentine’s Day and our anniversary.”
Carving out time for intimacy becomes even more vital as relationships progress. Connecting as a couple is an essential component of having a healthy and satisfying long-term relationship.
Among the numerous reasons to arrange a regular rendezvous with your significant other.
- Demonstrates the relationship is a priority, that it matters
- Creates space for flirtation, playfulness, fun, and laughter
- Strengthens bonds, commitment, and loyalty
- Increases intimacy, opens new lines of communication
- Relieves tension and stress
- Improves communication, fosters friendship
- Adds fresh, new, and novel experiences, offers a break from the ordinary
- Reveals hidden aspects of the other person’s personality
- Allows for deeper and expanded knowledge of their goals, dreams, wants, likes, dislikes, and fears
- Provides opportunities to develop, or further, shared interests and hobbies
- Ignites, or reignites, romantic sparks
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“When we were younger we enjoyed date night, now we enjoy being in bed by ten…”
Although we hear the term “date night” thrown around, there’s no reason dates can’t happen in the morning or afternoon.
“I’m not the dress up and go to a show type…”
If you don’t like to dress up, why not get messy while playing paintball.
Dates Don’t Have to be All About, or Just About, the Two of You.
You can go on a double date with another couple, join a book club, take a group tour, participate in a murder mystery dinner, survive an escape room, or focus on giving to others through volunteerism.
You could work cooperatively building model airplanes, or cultivate trust on a high ropes course.
Or, perhaps you’d rather see who really knows who with:
If you’re crunched for time, a date may mean stopping for ten minutes to hold hands while you watch the sun set. If you have time (and money), you might consider taking a two weeks off work to hop a plane to Europe.
Was your first date great? Recreate it! Do it again!
The desire to relax and rejuvenate might lead you to cuddle up with popcorn and Netflix, or send you to the spa for a couple’s massage.
The desire to step out of your comfort zone together might send you barreling down a zipline.
Maybe you only needed to attend an opera once, but you could spend a lifetime gardening together.
If you want your time together to be educational, you might use your “date night” to learn to speak another language or play an instrument. If you’re feeling ambitious and want something more active, swing dance lessons may be perfect.
Would You Rather Plan Dates Together, or Surprise Each Other?
Either way, I’d like to offer a few suggestions…